I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize