I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
