How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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