Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
