11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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