I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.