Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Randomize