Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize