Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  I'll probably hate you when I'm sober

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  (415): I'll probably hate you when I'm sober http://tfl.nu/uq7b
  Replies (28) Good night (3645) Bad night (916)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  I told you not to have sex with her on my futon

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I didnt dude, i swear!

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon

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  (952): I told you not to have sex with her on my futon (612): I didnt dude, i swear! (952): either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon http://tfl.nu/i90q
  Replies (19) Good night (2667) Bad night (6540)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...

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  (515): I have never made a good decision in that bathroom... http://tfl.nu/32pz
  Replies (3) Good night (2552) Bad night (1000)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?

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  (970): You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you? http://tfl.nu/r91h
  Replies (2) Good night (1031) Bad night (2596)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night

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  (785): Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night http://tfl.nu/utdq
  Replies (1) Good night (2213) Bad night (803)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.

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  (484): dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER. http://tfl.nu/xj2d
  Replies (5) Good night (2820) Bad night (796)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed

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  (336): There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed http://tfl.nu/1ryb
  Replies (4) Good night (1411) Bad night (874)
• Favorite

  (906): View more from Michigan

  You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"

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  (906): You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!" http://tfl.nu/38or
  Replies (10) Good night (2549) Bad night (598)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think

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  (732): because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think http://tfl.nu/340q
  Replies (8) Good night (1681) Bad night (582)
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...

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  (321): Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face... http://tfl.nu/4hpu
  Replies (3) Good night (359) Bad night (691)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.

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  (803): One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big. http://tfl.nu/i8v0
  Replies (10) Good night (1019) Bad night (440)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.

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  (907): according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it. http://tfl.nu/rmyb
  Replies (7) Good night (1059) Bad night (338)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!

  (386): View more from Florida

  Gravity is no match for my libido

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  (407): That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work! (386): Gravity is no match for my libido http://tfl.nu/l272
  Replies (2) Good night (889) Bad night (303)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.

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  (207): I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here. http://tfl.nu/lv1x
  Replies (0) Good night (521) Bad night (199)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall

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  (330): you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall http://tfl.nu/5i52
  Replies (3) Good night (1015) Bad night (271)

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