Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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