I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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