so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
