me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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