That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize