I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Randomize
