Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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