No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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