i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
