Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
