the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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