oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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