He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
