i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize