FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
