I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
