That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
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If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
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They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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