arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Randomize
