I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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