Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Randomize
