I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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