so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
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