Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
