well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
