he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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