You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
mondays should just be called national damage control day
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Randomize
