have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
