Having a random hookup so left but love u
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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