i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
