that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Randomize