you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize