Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
