dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
