We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
We need to get me chipped asap
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
