i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
she smelled like a LAN party
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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