...so i touched it.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Randomize