i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize