I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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