why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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