Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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