True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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