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• (914): View more from New York

  Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter

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• (707): View more from California

  My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers

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  17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  I feel like death gave me a hand job

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.

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• (760): View more from California

  If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.

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  These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men

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• (214): View more from Texas

  Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.

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• (479): View more from Arkansas

  Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.

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• (636): View more from Missouri

  They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...

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• (451): View more from

  Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'

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• (281): View more from Texas

  You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror

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• (408): View more from California

  she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her

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