you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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