Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
